Snapshots
by glo1196
Summary: Snapshots of Castle and Beckett's life present to the future, with a little smut added.Some spoiler references to episodes past, present and future, nothing to drastic. Chapters are their points of view. This is one of my stories so there will be M soon
1. Chapter 1

**Ok so I am trying something new for me. These are snapshots of Kate and Castle's life from this season forward. Each chapter is just a snapshot of their thoughts, or what is going on around them. They maybe short or long in length, and the entire thing will be rated M for freedom to have a sex scene, but as you can see the first one is tame. Oh, and there will be sex scenes eventually, I don't think I could write without one.**

**Disclaimer – not mine and that sucks!**

**Chpater 1**

She slides naked under the soft cool sheets and nestles her face into pillow. To tired too bother with her pajamas; she sinks deeper into the mattress. The sheets skirt over her body, like fingers ghosting over her skin, and her mind wanders to thoughts of him. A heavy sigh escapes her as she closes her eyes and snapshots of the day flash behind her eyes. She came so close. So very close to losing him that her heart still hurts, and there is still a tinge of nervous tension in her joints and muscles.

The minute she heard the explosion and the floor of the trailer she was standing in shake below her, her heart grew numb and skipped a beat. Pure unadulterated fear coursed through her veins. It was so debilitating that she was glued to the spot she stood in, until the hostage team tried to run around her towards the door. She made it to the door first, but doesn't remember how.

What she saw before her made the life she needed, and wanted flash before her eyes. Telling him that she loved him. Saying, "yes" while he was on one knee, the birth of their first child together, growing old together all the things she still had to do with him.

She dons her vest, draws her gun and runs through the bank, yelling his name. She knows there are other hostages, and she hopes they are all ok, but it is his name she yells, and him she needs to find. She has never felt anything so profound as the relief that washes over her when she realizes he is alive. His face is the most beautiful sight in the world, and she doesn't hesitate to go straight to him first.

She remembers the moment she kneels in front of him, and how she almost reaches out to pull his face forward to her lips. She wanted nothing more than to kiss his warm lips and wrap her arms around him. She pulls back and touches the collar of his jacket instead, then Martha breaks the spell. She loves Martha, but at that moment she wishes her on a deserted island somewhere in the middle of the Atlantic Ocean. The moment is broken, and she feels the blush rise in her cheeks.

Lying in her bed she remembers the rest of the evening at Casa de Castle. Good food, great wine, and the feeling of belonging she just can't shake. When did she just start belonging there? She doesn't remember the exact moment, but it has been a while.

She vividly relives the final moments before she leaves for home. He helps her into her coat, and pulls her hair out from the collar. Something he has never done before. She holds her breath at the touch of his fingers as they glide over the back of her neck, and has to fight the need to close her eyes and lean into him. He walks around and pulls her collar up to keep her warm as she does the strap around her waist.

"Thank you for everything you did today, Kate." His voice is low and she feels it vertebrate through her, his eyes search hers. She falls into his eyes and loses herself in them.

"I couldn't lose you, Castle. You're my partner and there's so much more left for us to do. You can't go anywhere." She smiles and she fidgets not knowing exactly what to do next. She wants to wrap her hands around his neck and feast on his lips until they are drunk with each other.

Her hand traces his jaw as her thumb skims his cheek, then drops down to his shoulder. She stands on her toes and leans forward and places a soft gentle kiss on his cheek. Lingering there longer than was necessary. Before pulling back and whispering, " There is still a whole lot of Richard Castle I want to explore." Then she turns around, opens the door and walks away. She sneaks a look at him before he closes the door, and is rewarded with a vision of Castle she will never forget.

Now as she lies in her bed, she closes her eyes and wishes her walls would crumble around her once and for all. Her body hums its betrayal as the overwhelming feeling of need for him coils deep within her. She wants him and wants him badly as she lies there. Every inch of her screams for a relief she knows he can only bring. Her thoughts drift to what it would be like to be with him, how his hands and lips would feel gliding over her body, and what she could do to make him moan her name.

Her breathing evens out as sleep finally starts to overtake her and thoughts of Castle meld into her dreams. Her lips turn upwards as she remembers she has another day with him and thanks whatever powers are out there that gave her another day with him in her life.

**Should I continue? Review and let me know, feel free to leave snapshots you want me to write about…let's have some fun! Review below please? I am so addicted to them.**


	2. Chapter 2

**Here, is chapter two of Snapshots. Would love input as to what you guys would like to see for snapshots of their lives. I am trying to stay with the current episodes in this season, and add missing pieces. Would love to hear what you think. Is there not enough sexual tension, or just enough? Please, let me know.**

**Disclaimer – nope not mine, just borrowing them…thank you very much.**

**Chapter 2**

The sound of his phone permeates the hazy fog of sleep he is in. Her scantly clad image starts to fade as his conscious mind registers the ringing phone. He absentmindedly reaches an arm out from under his pillow and fumbles around his nightstand blindly, cursing until his fingers wander upon it. He grabs his cell awkwardly and brings it to his face; he knows only one person would call him at this time of the night.

"Castle." His voice is deep and still heavy with sleep. There is silence on the other end for a second. Then he hears her telling him that a body has dropped on the corner of 17th and Lexington.

He yawns and tells her he'll meet her as soon as he finds some clothes. He almost misses the slight giggle she makes. He hopes she has conjured up a good mental image of him naked.

"Well, make sure you do Castle. It is quite cold out today, wouldn't want you freezing anything off out here." He knows he has made her smile, and his morning has started on a good note. "See you soon, Castle."

He jumps out of bed and rummages through his clean clothes for something to wear. He knows she likes him in blue and tries to wear it as often as possible without being too obvious. He almost takes a dive putting on his shoes and trying to get out the door at the same time. Luckily he catches himself and no harm done.

He catches the elevator to the ground floor, waves to the night doorman, who is now used to him leaving at these strange hours.

"Got another one, Mr C.?" He asks Castle as he opens the door for him.

"Murder never sleeps, Matthew. Off to another one." He says as he walks through the door. The doorman nods his head and closes the door behind him. Castle walks to the corner coffee shop and orders their coffee and bearclaws, he even gets one for Lanie today. He hails a cab as soon as he comes out and is at the murder scene in no time. Traffic at 4 am is still minimal in New York, give it another hour or so and it will pick up.

He arrives at the scene and he greets the officer that points him in the right direction and lifts the police tape for him to go under. He spots the team and walks over, and he wonders how she can look so beautiful and put together at 4:30 am. She smiles at him as she watches him approach and thanks him as she takes her coffee with both hands and takes a long swig of it. He wants to memorize the face and sound she makes when she takes that first sip each day, and hopes he can be the cause of that for many years to come.

The murder victim literally fell from the sky and is sprawled across the dented roof of a 1994 Lincoln Towncar. She has no identification and no one heard or saw a thing. Beckett starts giving people instructions. "Uni's can canvas the street and look in dumpsters and cans for identification, Ryan and Espo interview anyone and everyone in the buildings who may have heard or seen anything." She turns and starts to walk away.

"You coming, Castle?" she says over her shoulder as she walks away. He startles, and hands Lanie her bearclaw then scampers up behind his pretty detective.

"So where are we going?" he asks her as he catches up to her.

"Let's go search through missing persons and see what we can find." They pull into traffic and are at the station in no time.

The case gets more and more convoluted and they call it quits for the day at 9:30pm. Castle and Beckett decide for burgers at Remy's before heading home. They sit in their booth and talk about anything and everything. Anyone that sees them would think they were married. He wipes the ketchup off the corner of her mouth with the napkin, she pulls his ear in jest, and they eat each other's food. Their legs brush against each other too often to be coincidence.

Remy's isn't far from her apartment and Castle insists on walking her. As they walk both are conscious of their shoulders touching or the tingling feeling of their hands brushing against each other. She wishes he would put his arm around her so she could lean into him and breath in his scent, but his hands stay at his side.

They reach the entrance of her apartment. She wants to ask him up, but knows that would start something neither is ready for. She smiles at him, and he takes her hand and squeezes it for just one moment.

"Until tomorrow, Kate. " he says he pulls her hair behind her ear and places a soft open-mouthed kiss to her cheek. He feels her shiver and a sigh escape her lips. He loves that he causes this reaction in her. She doesn't move away.

"Someday soon Mr. Castle, I am going to ask you up to my apartment after one of these late night meals, and I am going to make you give me many more of those chills you are so proud of right now." She feels his arms snake around her waist and pull her closer to him.

"Castle," his name escapes her lips in a gasp, laden with lust as she hugs him to her. His face nestled in the crook of her neck heightened the feeling of his breath caressing her skin. Unconsciously she angles her head to give him better access needing his lips on her skin.

He pulls away reluctantly. "You need to rest so you have fresh eyes tomorrow, and that is not going to happen if I don't leave soon. Until tomorrow detective." He steps away and off the sidewalk to hail a cab again. She turns and unlocks the door to her building and watches him get into the cab. They smile at each other as the cab pulls away.

Her phone buzzes with an incoming message from him. She smiles thinking how he just left and was already texting her. "Sweet dreams Kate, see you tomorrow," it read.

"Sweet Dreams, Castle, I'll be seeing you in my dreams tonight." She sends back.

He reads her response and closes his eyes as he leans his head back on the seat of the taxi. If she only knew she had been in all his dreams now for a long time. He smiles the rest of the way home and into his apartment.

**So? What do you guys think? Should I continue? Drop me a review and let me know…Pretty Please**? **I really would love to know what you think. I have 5 chapters of this fanfic written, but if there is no interest I don't want to waste anyone's time continuing. If you put the story or me on alert let me know what you liked, say "HI." I would love to hear from you. So, please let me know. Dying for next week's episode, and the two-parter after that. **


	3. Chapter 3

**I know that with the "M" rating people are expecting more smut. Believe me when I tell you there will be. I am using the season as it is now and when I get past the point they are at now, just get ready. I want there to be a build up, just like in the show, though of course it won't last 4 years. Please be patient. Thank you for those of you that have reviewed, you guys make my day. Some of you have made suggestions and I hope some of you see your suggestions in my writing, because they have helped! Thanks again for reading….it's nice to know people are….**

**Disclaimer - We all know I am not the owner of Castle, so this seems a little stupid to me…NO, not mine once again.**

**Chapter 3**

Somehow, he had finagled her into spending every holiday this year with him. Thanksgiving she had with him and his family in the afternoon, and with her Dad that evening. Christmas Day none of the Castle family would take "no" for an answer and she and her Dad's presence had been requested. It had been as long as Johanna was dead since they celebrated Christmas, and she was nervous. Martha, Alexis and Rick made them feel welcome and they had had a great time. At least while they were there the sad memories were kept at bay.

As she and Jim were getting ready to leave, Castle suddenly appears with a silly Santa hat sporting a sprig of mistletoes on the top. She finishes putting on her coat and looks at Castle, with a raised eyebrow, and a smirk on her lips.

"Subtlety is definitely not your strong point, Castle." She laughs and gives him a kiss on the cheek. From behind them she hears Martha say, "For God's sake detective it's Christmas and it's mistletoe, plant a good one on him, once and for all." She thinks on it for only an instant.

Smiling at Castle, she winds her fingers around the back of his neck and pulls him towards her. He feels her breath against his neck as she speaks. "Your mother thinks I should plant one on you right here in front of everyone." She looks at him and his eyes are wide with shock.

Pulling his face down, their lips meet. Her lips gently ghost over his. He feels her tongue brush across his bottom lip, and then she gently sucks into her mouth, she feels her teeth nibble on him. His eyes close and he is about to deepen the kiss when her lips are suddenly gone. He opens his eyes and sees her looking at him with doe like eyes.

"Merry Christmas, Rick. Thank you for everything, Always." Then she is gone, before he can say anything. He returns to his family, but the kiss lingers on his lips all night long.

It's finally New Years Eve and she has been in his arms dancing most of the evening. His party is in full swing with less than ½ an hour until ball drops. She can feel the energy in the room, or maybe it is just the alcohol everyone; including herself, has been consuming in large quantities.

He has not been able to tear his eyes off of her. Her shopping excursion with Lanie was a success with her buying the sexy red dress she has on tonight. It clings to all the right places, almost indecently short and shows just enough cleavage, to tantalize him. Her hair cascades over her shoulders in soft curls, like she knows he likes.

"You look incredible, Kate." he says against her ear as he holds her tightly against him. "That dress…" He doesn't continue, but his thoughts drift to him peeling the dress slowly off her body and making her yell his name as he gives her pleasure.

They're dancing to a fast beat song at the moment. She's turned away from him and is pressing herself against him as she moves her hips. Meeting her thrust for thrust and they both know they are playing with fire. She can feel just how much she is affecting him against her backside. The song ends and a slow song begins. Her arms snake around his neck and she plays with the hair at the back of his head. His fingers trace a path down her arm, then down the side of her body, where his fingers curl around her hips as he moves her against him. He hears her moan against his ear.

"Castle, you're killing me." She whispers in his ear. She hears him chuckle against her ear. She fights the urge to suck his earlobe between her lips, bite it then soothe it with her tongue.

"But what a way to go, Detective," he answers her, and she can't for the life of her disagree.

Champagne is being passed out to everyone in the crowd, by well dressed waiters. Less than 5 minutes until the New Year. Castle grabs two glasses as the tray passes by them and hands her one. Their bodies still melded together and swaying (or better gyrating) to the music still being played.

She looks around the room, and everyone is getting ready for the big moment, and pairing up for their traditional New Years Eve kiss. Lanie and Esposito have already started kissing before the countdown. Ryan and Jenny are staring into each other's eye saying something profound to each other. Martha is with her new man and she doesn't even want to think where she may be. Alexis is with her friends and is the only person in the room who has her eyes on them. Kate smiles at her and she smiles back.

The countdown begins 10….9….8….

"Here's to another New Year may it be better than last year." Castle says to her.

5…..4…..3….2….1…..Happy New Years!

In an instant his lips are on hers and the noise and sounds of the party fade away. The tension that they have built up all night suddenly releases, and neither of them can stop themselves. They are lost in their little world as their lips crash hungrily against each other. He deepens the kiss and she welcomes it as their tongues duel. She feels the heat coursing through her body and a small moan escapes her. He reacts by pulling her closer and grinding his hips against her. She feels his hard length against her. His hand snakes around her back and traces the length of her spine; instantly causing her body to respond. Her hands fist his shirt, forcefully pulling him against her. She wants to devour him right here, oblivious to the crowd around them.

Suddenly they are jerked forward and they hear Lanie as she walks by, "You two better come up for air before one of us has to perform CPR on you."

Separating an acceptable distance they look at each other. Kate tries to shoot Lanie a dirty look, but the smile on her friends face makes her give it up. Lanie mouths, "It's about damn time," and turns towards Esposito again.

"Well, that sure was a wonderful way to start the New Year," Castle says, as they get lost in each other's eyes again. She draws her bottom lip and bites it, like she does when she is thinking. Then she touches her lips and smiles at him, as another song comes on. His hand drops low on her back and the feeling causes a tingling sensation low in her belly.

"To a New Year and new beginnings, Castle." She tells him as they raise their glasses and drink. He bends and places a gentle kiss on her lips. She lets the warmth of the kiss flow through her. He watches her for a few minutes as they enjoy this new aspect of their partnership.

"Let's go find Martha and Alexis and wish them a Happy New Years," she says and he grabs her hand and starts walking around the loft looking for his family. Their intertwined fingers catch her attention, and bring a smile to her face. It feels right.

Maybe this year, she thinks to herself. This year the wall will crumble and she will be able to jump in with both feet, and be there for him the way they both want and need. It feels like they are so close already.

Martha and Alexis are standing together by the windows in the living room. Both women extend their arms out to them and give them hugs. Well wishes for a Happy New Year are extended. She marvels at how easily this family accepts her, like she belongs.

It is a New Year and a new beginning, this time she is going to make sure that this year things go right.

**Each chapter they step closer, I promise you will find a ton of progression and heat, though maybe not full out smut soon. I know since the next three chapters have been written So, all you guys who have me on alert, and may just happen to read this, let me know what you think. I know there has to be interest or you would not have this on alert. Tell me what you like, what you want to see. Not long now until the "Blue Butterfly." I can't wait…daydream or not, I love the 1940's era and can't wait to see them in those outfits! Of course a kiss or two would definitely make my day too!**


	4. Chapter 4

**This chapter is based on "Kill Shot" it jumps around the episode and what Kate is feeling each time. Kate needs to come to terms with everything that has happened and the scars left behind, both physical and emotional. She feels like she no longer has a good handle on anything, and is damaged goods. My heart broke for her in this episode. It was one of the few times where she seemed so alone, truly shattered. I hope you enjoy this chapter.**

**Disclaimer – nope Andrew Marlowe owns them, though I borrow them occasionally without his permission.**

**Chapter 4**

She stands before the full-length mirror in her bedroom, in her black bra and her high waisted work pants. She turns sideways to get a better look and her fingers ghost the pink puckered scar that mars her right side. She closes her eyes and her mind drifts to that deceptively sunny day last May. Flashes of memory skim past. Castle's voice yelling her name seconds before he tackles her, seconds before the bullet reaches her. She closes her eyes reliving the instant the bullet rips through her chest, and the noise it makes as it tries to suck the life out of her. She remembers hearing Esposito voice yelling "Beckett down," and people screaming and running around her.

Then it's his face and his words that day that will forever be etched in her heart and soul. He loves her and his words; his words said in desperation keep her grounded to this earth. They give her the strength to fight through the darkness, because she wants more than anything to someday say them back.

"Don't leave me. Please? Stay with me ok? Kate, I love you. I love you, Kate."

His hands hold her close, cradling her head, willing her to stay with him. It's his eyes brimming with unshed tears and his words begging her to stay with him that make her fight to live, to hold on with everything she's got. He doesn't know how he affects her.

Her fingers continue to the scar under her bra and she is thankful that this one is hidden by her breast and unseen. In her eyes, the scars are just one more reminder that make her damaged goods, unfit to be loved, especially loved by him. Every step they take closer makes her feel like she doesn't deserve him, and that he deserves better.

Her fingers trace the lacey bra to the area between her breasts where the bullet-sized scar reminds her daily that she is a marked woman. That someone out there wants her dead. Her fingers trace the round scar as tears run down her cheeks; the memories suck the breath out of her with their intensity and she closes her eyes and rides out the intense feelings of hopelessness.

The PTSD is marring her judgment in this case and she is acutely aware that she is close to her breaking point. Two shootings and two deaths and she feels the crosshairs on her back every time she leaves the precinct. Dr. Burke wants her to step away from the case, it's her case and she won't do that.

She goes to her apartment at the end of the day and tries to settle down; instead she pulls out an un-opened bottle of whiskey. She pours herself a half a glass and downs it in one swoop, trying to numb the fear and paranoia within her. The liquid burns as it slides down her throat and she relishes in the feeling it gives her. She pours herself another glass and it immediately chases the first one. An hour later and she is well into feeling the affects of the alcohol. It's making her feel dizzy, but instead of numbness she feels she feels a heightened sense of fear and anxiety, she pours the last of the bottle in her glass and drinks it, hoping to find the numbness she seeks.

Outside her apartment a car backfires and she throws herself off the sofa tipping over the table holding her gun, the glass and the bottle. The glass shatters against the floor. She closes the blinds as paranoia engulfs her and she feels trapped, hunted by gunmen her minds see lurking around every corner. There is no question in her mind that he is out there right, adjusting the site of his rifle, waiting to take his next lethal shot. She spots her gun on the floor and throws herself towards it. Her arms skid over the broken glass on the floor imbedding itself in her forearm. She's numb against the splinters embedded in her arm. Grabbing the gun in her hand, she scoots between her end table and the wall for burrowing for protection. Her eyes search the room in panic for any sign for the intruder aiming crosshairs in her direction.

She watches the blood trickle down her arm and for the first time she feels the pain of the glass chards in her arm. The streams of blood flowing down her arm mesmerize her, and she sits watching them, waiting for what seems like hours before finally getting enough courage to stand up and clean her wounds.

She cleans her wounds with an antiseptic, and then bandages her arm. She cleans up the mess she made of her living room, as best she can and enters her bedroom. Collapsing on her bed in tears, her body shakes uncontrollably. She wants to call him, she wants him to come, hold her close, and tell her it will be ok. She needs him to touch her and make her feel loved and cherished. To run his fingers through her hair and whisper the words of encouragement, she knows he would give so freely.

She can't do that though. She can't let him see how flawed she is, how broken and wrong she would be for him. She wants him to be proud of her, to put her on a pedestal because in his eyes she is perfect. If he sees the mess she has become he will not ever want her. So she cries into her pillow and gets through this like she has gotten through so many other things, alone.

Her life flashes before her eyes again, but this time the killer is standing no farther than 5 feet in front of her. If he shoots she will die instantly at this range. She tries to talk him down and for a second he starts to lower his gun, but then raises it again and takes aim at her. She waits knowing this time there will be no second chances.

She hears the gunshot and then Lee Travis is lying there in a pool of his blood. She crawls to his body and tries to find a pulse, but there isn't one. Getting up she staggers over to the window and sees Esposito on the rooftop of the opposite building with his rifle. She has never been so happy or grateful to see him. She leans against the wall and sinks to the floor until she hears voices and footsteps approaching.

When she enters the precinct, he is sitting in her chair. She looks at him and he looks tired and worn down, intense guilt floods through her as she acknowledges that she is the one to blame for it. He looks like he is afraid to say anything, but she thanks him for giving her space to get through this. He smiles at her, though it doesn't quite reach his eyes, and she knows he does not hold it against her. As he starts to walk away she wants to call him back and ask him to dinner or a drink, but he needs to get away from the precinct and her. He needs to spend time with his family, and maybe he can rest and finally relax.

**Ok, so there is C2 for fanfics that get more than 100 reviews. I am hoping I can get this one to 100 so it can be added to it. So, please if you read this story and haven't or of you read and have…please leave me a review? I'd love it! Beckett really does love him. She wants to be the best she can be for him, she doesn't see that he loves her just the way she is. That he loves her with her flaws. I am finding it harder and harder to call the detective "Beckett" as she becomes more "Kate." Hope you are still enjoying this, and please review below, I would appreciate it.**


	5. Chapter 5

**I know that Kate is OOC in this story. I am writing it as in how I would have liked things to have gone, with a little more flirting and sexual tension, without going way out on a limb with them having sex right off. Eventually this will continue past the episodes we have seen and will be all my imagination. God help us then…LOL. I am a Caskett shipper all the way, and can't wait for them to get together, though the build up is half the fun for me. Thank you for those who reviewed. Didn't get to many, so maybe I should start wrapping this one up.**

The Old Haunt and Remy's are their regular stomping grounds. They gather at either when they need to eat and relax, let their hair down. The Old Haunt has become a mix of writers and New York's finest in blue, especially from the 12th precinct. It feels homey and it doesn't hurt that they know the owner and their team isn't allowed to pay. Its a place where it is ok to be themselves.

Today the gang is at their regular table in the back of the bar. Ryan and Jenny sit together in the middle, his arm around her shoulder protectively. There are just a few days left until their wedding and they could use the time away from all the planning. Their cleansing has now been abandoned. Next to them are Beckett and Castle, his arm isn't around her, but they physically can't get any closer as every part of them that can touch by sitting next to each other is touching. Lanie and Esposito are the only ones separated and each of them is keeping their distance from the other and sitting on opposite ends of the round booth.

"Jenny you should have seen Ryan on Espo's back trying to get the donut out of his hand." Kate said as she swatted Castle's hand from her fries. "If we hadn't come in when we did, I don't know what would have happened."

Everyone laughs as Ryan sticks a popper in his mouth. "God it's good to eat food again, sorry I broke Jenny. I really tried." He turns the sad puppy dog eyes on her.

"Those baby blues won't work on me Ryan Patrick, but I will confess that it has been long enough." She wipes sauce off his upper lip. "I'm glad you are feeling better with a little food in your system." She gives him a smooch and the rest make faces at them.

"Speaking of, we've been here long enough. We have an early morning appointment with the florist before I come into the station and need to get going. Anyone need a ride?" Ryan puts down his drink as they try to scoot out of the booth.

"I'll take one bro, if it isn't much trouble." Esposito asks as he moves to let the couple out, and grab his coats.

"Not a problem." Ryan answers.

They do rounds of goodnights and see you tomorrows before the threesome walks away and out the door. Lanie waits til they exit and gets up and grabs her coat.

"Where are you going?" Beckett asks her. "It's still early."

"I wanna get home and soak in a bath for a while. I got called in early today and have to be to work early tomorrow. Imma gonna catch myself a cab and relax for a bit before hitting the hay." She turns to Beckett and gives her a hug. "Besides three's a crowd. You don't do anything I wouldn't do. Who am I kidding, girl for once just go wild will ya." She whispers in her ear as she pulls away.

Kate smiles at Lanie as she lets go and puts on her coat. "I'll see about that, Lanie." And she gives her friend a wink as she walks away.

"So, it's just you and me Kate. Want another drink?" as he points to her empty glass and raises an eyebrow, in his patent bad boy look.

"Sure, Castle. Why don't you surprise me?" She smiles at him and she watches his face light up.

Kate watches Castle walk to the bar. Her eyes run over his body and take him in. He is wearing one of her favorite shirts. The jewel blue color brings out the blue in his eyes, he has on a pair of well-fitted jeans that accentuate one of his best features in her opinion. She watches his walk away and wonders what it would feel like to run her nails down his back in the middle of her orgasm.

"Kate?" he is looking at her funny. "Whatever you are daydreaming about must be very good, by the look on your face."

"Wouldn't you like to know, Castle? A girl's got to have some secrets to make her mysterious. Don't you think?" She looks up at him as he places her drink on the table in front of her.

Castle freezes as he watches her eyes darken with arousal. She lifts her drink to her lips and looks at him over the edge of the glass, licking the edge of the glass and then draining her glass in one swoop. Castle's mind drifts to a place where she makes all his dreams come true.

"Cat got your tongue, Castle?" she asks him with a hint of mischievousness in her voice. Her flirting has taken him completely by surprise tonight, but before he couldn't think too much about it she was looking at him expecting an answer.

"Hey, are you listening to me? Earth to writer boy." She was teasing him for being caught in a daydream like she had. "Are you going to just stand there, or are you going to dance with me?"

He looks at her and extends his hand to her, as he takes a deep bow, "Could I have the honor of this dance with my lady?" She takes his hand and he walks her to the center of the dance floor. She puts her arms around his neck and his hands sit comfortably on her hips. As the song continues the space between them grows smaller until she presses tightly to him. Her body molding to his in all the right places making her shiver in his arms.

"Mmmm, this is nice," she whispers in his ear as they move slowly around the dance floor. His hands wrap around her and fall low on her back, far lower than he has ever gone. He applies pressure to her hips and she makes contact with his obvious arousal.

The song changes to something more upbeat, but Kate doesn't retreat to the booth. She grabs both his hands and swings herself around so their linked arms crisscross in front of her, and her back is flush against his chest. She can feel him hard against her backside and she shamelessly grinds herself into him. The alcohol giving her the courage she usually lacks. A lust like molten lava winds through her veins and settles at her core as they dance. She feels his face near her neck and hears the growl escape his lips.

"Keep that up Detective, and you might have to arrest me to keep me from touching you." His voice sent a chill down her body, making her moan slightly. The sound does not go un-noticed by him.

She dances with him sliding her body suggestively against him. His thumbs extend out and gently caress the underside of her breasts over her dress, and he feels her shiver in his arms. His hands move over her body as she slithers against his chest and already growing erection. Her head leans back against his shoulder and his name escapes like a whisper on her lips, the scrap of material masquerading as a thong soaks with her arousal.

"Castle…" she moans indecently.

She wants him. Every bit of her body is screaming out for him to touch her. Her body betrays her and she turns in his arms. Her lips brush the crease of his neck and he feels her teeth against his skin. Her body has melded against his and is moving deliciously over him. His hands have slid to cup her ass and crush her against him, his hardness rubbing against her core. She lets him guide them away from the dance floor, and into a dark corner of the bar. Her back is firmly planted against the wall with him surrounding every inch of her. She raises her leg and hooks it around his hip drawing him closer, her hands now under his jacket and roaming freely over his chest. Undoing a button or three of his shirt to have better access to his muscular chest.

His lips crash against her, and bite her bottom lip as another moan escapes her. The tip of her tongue glides across his lips and he deepens the kiss instantly. Their tongues duel for dominance in a tantalizing dance. Rough hands cup her breasts and the jolt that passes through her body makes her want to rip his clothes off and the world be damned. She knows she is making him come undone, and she wants this, needs this. His lips start to travel and she can't think anymore. The serious hardnosed detective wants nothing then to loose herself in the feel his body slamming her into the wall as she shatters, against the wall. She opens her eyes and remembers exactly where they are. Over Castle's shoulder she sees the bartender at the bar enjoying the view of them in the corner.

"Castle," she tries to say with some forcefulness. "Rick." She puts her hands on his chest and pushes him away with more force. She watches the light go out of his eyes and the look of rejection and pain cross his features. He steps back and turns around instantly away from her. It hits her hard that he will automatically shut down and blame himself. She has done this to him and now this adorable dork is do what he thinks is best for her. She does not wait long before her assumptions are proven correct.

"Kate….I uh….I'm sorry. I don't know what came over me. I'm sorry. I know you are mad. I…." He starts to walk away. "I won't come in for a few days. I didn't…" He walks away, heading for the door heartbroken. She is rooted to the wall, speechless and frozen. This isn't what she wants. She wants him, needs him….

"Castle!" she practically yells. "Castle stop!" her voice is needy and pleading, it stops him. He doesn't turn to face her, his shoulders slump and she doesn't want to think of what his face may look like.

"I don't want you to apologize, Castle. I want this as much as you do, just not here, not now. We deserve better than in a bar, against the wall." She isn't even looking at him anymore, but she grabs his hand and she can feel him close behind her as they walk towards their booth.

"I started this Castle. I know what I am doing. I'm not running." Her voice so low he just barely hears her, but her eyes are shining with the love she feels for him. "I've stopped running."

"Kate. " His voice is laden with so many emotions. He places his hand on her arm as she turns around and then sits down.

"Please, come sit with me? Don't pull away I don't want you to. This was bound to happen, and I am glad it finally did. I don't regret it. Now we both know…" she smiles at him as she takes his hand and leads him back to the booth. She slides in dragging him in behind her, and when they get to the middle she swings his arm tightly around her. "Don't let go, Castle."

They spend the rest of the night talking, about everything, their fears and wants, their concerns and their desires. As they walked out of The Old Haunt late he holds her incredibly close and kisses her as he has always wanted to, so many times before. She gets into her cab and as it drives off she watches him smile, and her heart fills with love for him. Tonight wasn't the night…but it will be soon, of that there was no longer a doubt in her mind.

**I loved The Blue Butterfly. I loved how they worked the noir into the episode it felt smooth. The costumes were just costume as were the sets. Nathan and Stana as well as the rest of the cast hit it out of the park! The kiss wasn't in real time, but I was happy with it. It did go with the 1940's movie kisses of the era. I loved that they actually touched and that Kate and Castle envisioned the ending for Joe and Vera, as they were never told the ending. Please let me know what you think of this chapter and the story. If people are getting bored I will just post the next two chapters I have almost done and then finish it. Can't wait until next weeks "Pandora" the promos are up! Now review before you go look, Please?**


	6. Chapter 6

"After that experience, if I ever have to be hitched to someone, it would be you." He says as they approach her desk, and they start getting ready to leave.

"Hitched?" She asks him as she raises an eyebrow and looks at him with a grin on her face.

"Hitched?" he acts like she heard him wrong. "No, I didn't say hitched, I said cuffed. Handcuffed. Not hitched, the colloquial or any other connotation or meaning." Kate smiles, watching him flounder as he helps her with her coat. She pulls her hair out from the collar of her coat.

"It's okay, Castle. I understood what you meant. And for what it's worth, if I ever have to spend another night handcuffed to someone again, I wouldn't mind if it was you, either." She looks at him and gives him a sly little smile, catching him off guard.

"Really?" He was totally surprised by what she had just admitted to.

"But next time, let's do it without the tiger." She looks at him and gives him a smoldering knowing smile. Her look letting him know that there will definitely be a next time.

"Next time?" He questions, though she is to far too really listen. He watches her walk confidently to the elevator and get in. Damn that woman he thinks to himself.

Her heart beats so fast she feels like it might burst right out of her chest. She saw the realization of what she had said cross his features, and the smile that graced his face seconds before the elevator doors closed. The stress of today has every nerve ending in her body on alert. Waking up next to him, being handcuffed to him and saying nothing about the adrenaline rush from the tiger has her emotions on edge.

She takes the elevator to the basement where she parked her bike, and puts on her helmet as she approaches it. Her mind on her words to Castle and she thinks about what he would do watching her mount and ride her Harley. She smiles and makes a quick decision. She pulls out her phone and sends a text. She replaces her coat with the leather coat that she stores in the seat of the Harley.

**Have you left yet? **

**Nope, still here can't seem to make my feet work yet**. He responds honestly.

**Meet me out front for a minute? **She smiles as she wonders what his reaction will be.

**You want to get started on "Next time?"** She rolls her eyes at his response, though it puts a smile on her face. If only he knew just how close she was to just that.

**Forget it, I'll see you tomorrow.** She doesn't mean it, but she knows he will rush downstairs now afraid that she will leave.

**Be right there.**

She pulls up just as he is exiting the station and starts looking around for him. She straddles the Harley and waits for a few seconds to see if he recognizes her. After a few seconds and as he is pulling his phone out to text her, she removes her helmet and shakes out her hair.

"You looking for me, Castle?" she says as he immediately stops what he is doing as his eyes rake over her body hungrily. She gives him a sexy look and waits for him to find his voice.

"You….the bike….handcuffs…could this day get any better?" he fumbles his words but his face is beaming like at kid with free reign at the toy store. He takes a step towards her.

"Well Castle, I was thinking. I keep a spare helmet in my locker and if you needed a ride home…." He was already running into the building before she had even finished the sentence. She laughs expecting either a text or call any second, considering she locked her locker.

**I can't get in, it's locked**! He texts her.

She types out the combination and sends it to him, knowing she has to change it again on Monday. Letting Castle know her combination would be a serious slip in judgment.

Minutes later he is back on the sidewalk holding a black helmet. He puts it on his head and she adjusts it for him, causing her hands to brush against his face numerous times. Her eyes can't help meeting his stare as she helped him tighten the strap.

"Come on Castle, get on."

For the second time today his hips are aligned perfectly against her tight backside. He instantly places his large hands on her thighs as he waits for her to balance the bike and kick the stand out. His hands burn their imprint through her already sensitive skin, making the coil deep in her belly twist unbearably and delicious warmth spread through her body. She feels the moistness seeping between her legs, dampening the scrappy lace thong she is wearing.

"Castle, " her voice sounding too high pitched and desperate, to her ears. "You might want to hold me around my waist, for better leverage."

She breathes out a huge sigh of relief as he slowly removes his hands from her tense legs. The sound doesn't go unnoticed. His warm hands find her waist and snake forward around her middle finally resting, splayed open across her stomach. Beckett stops her mind from thinking about his hands slipping gently down her body from where they are, as she starts the bike. The vibration of the bike under her, his hands on her body and his chest pressed tightly against her back, do nothing to quench the heat coursing violently through her veins. She pulls down her visor and steers the bike into traffic carefully.

Fifteen minutes later, she slows down as they approach Castle's loft. His hands slide down past her hips, to the top of her thighs again. Castle feels the muscles tense under her jeans, and instinctively squeezes her thigh. His fingers feel the shiver that suddenly wracks her body, and the barely audible moan that escapes her lips.

He runs his fingers low across her back as he dismounts the bike. She is still sitting on the bike looking forward, her hands white-knuckling the grips of the handlebar. Removing his helmet, Castle waits for her to say something. He removes the helmet and looks at her with a smile that melts her heart.

"You like the ride, Castle?" she asks him, already knowing the answer by the look on his face. He stares at her making her face flush.

"You can give me a ride anytime, Beckett." Her grip on the handlebars gets tighter and she stifles the moan trying to escape as the picture of her riding him flashes before her eyes. She feels his touch on her hand and looks up at him.

"Hey, you look a little tense why don't you come on up for a drink? Mother and Alexis are away until tomorrow night and I wouldn't mind the company." He says innocently enough.

"I don't think it's a good idea, Castle." She feels her control slipping. The heat between her legs has grown and she feels the wetness continue to seep between her legs as she bites her bottom lips.

His hand glides down her arm and then to his side in disappointment. "Come on, I'll even cook for you."

She loosens the death grip on her handlebars and removes her helmet. Shaking her hair out, Castle stares at her in with a child-like wonderment. He is taken back at her flushed face and the cascade of auburn hair falling over her face and shoulders. He is struck by how beautiful she is.

"Castle?" she says breaking the trance he is in.

He suddenly feels her eyes on him, and he has to stop himself from kissing her right there on the street. She has been right all along. The sight of her straddling a bike was much more than he could handle. He wants her and there was no question about it with the look he is shooting her way. She knows she shouldn't go upstairs, that they both wanted the same thing; and are playing with fire.

She goes to open her mouth, when Castle steps towards her and half whispers, half growls in her ear.

"Let me try and satisfy that appetite of yours, Kate." She feels his breath skirts her ear and her neck, causing her to shiver noticeably again and sigh.

She chooses her words carefully, to let him know that they are on the same page, because there is no denying that she wants him anymore.

"Take me upstairs, Castle." She says breathy and warm against him. She locks up the bike and they take the helmets with them into the building.

His free hand falls low on her back as they walk through the lobby to the elevator. The doors open almost immediately and they walk in. Castle wastes no time crowding her against the back wall. Pressing her body against the elevator wall with his. His hands burn a trail of a path molten fire through her body. Her body melts into his and she reaches up around his neck and brings his lips crashing down on hers.

She feels him hard against her center and her hips betray her and grind against him. The need to have him closer has her lifting a leg around his hip; his hands palm her breasts aggressively. They are lost in the moment, until the ding of the elevator announces their arrival at his floor. A blush rises into Kate's cheeks as they pull apart reluctantly.

"You're beautiful." He says as his fingers intertwine with hers, and he pulls her towards his loft.

"You're not so bad yourself, Castle." She whispers as they approach his doorway.

"Not the first time you've used those words." He says remembering their visit to California and the feelings that rose to the surface during that trip.

"No, its not. Only this time instead of dreaming of kissing you, I can actually do it. If you only knew how close we came in L.A, Castle." She doubts he ever had a clue about the many times she was about to reach out and fate intervened. They walk in and he takes their coats as she settles into his warm sofa. A few seconds later he joins her, sitting as close as he possibly could.

"I was scared that night, Castle. I wanted you so badly; my body betrayed me in every way. My mind insisted that I would only be a notch in your bedpost. That you would leave after you had finally gotten what you wanted. Even with that I came back out and was willing to give it a shot, but you were just closing your door as I opened mine. I went back to bed and sought relief from you in other ways. "

"Beckett, I didn't know. I knew you would never be a notch in my bedpost after the first year. It broke my heart to see you with other men." He hates admitting that he was so smitten with her for so long, but he truly knew he loved her. "I wanted you for my own, but I wasn't ever good enough. I was the friend, the sidekick, your partner, but nothing else. Everyone knew and still knows that it isn't about the books and it hasn't been for a while, it's about you."

She looks into his eyes and she feels like she is drowning in a sea of love that she sees there. Her hand reaches up and pushes the hair out of his eyes. She runs her fingers through it, and marvels at it's softness.

"It's Kate here, Castle. I am not a detective here, I am just me." She runs her fingers across his forehead and down to trace the angles of his jaw. She remembers when they first met and how she wanted to run her fingers over the four o'clock shadow he sometimes sported, so many times. He had such a bad boy image back then.

"That summer, was uh…so painful for me. I broke up with Demming that morning, and I was going to tell you that I would love to spend the time with you. I couldn't bear that you were going to leave, and I wasn't sure you were going to come back. I was trying to tell you when Gina showed up all smitten and happy, ready to collect you. "

"You looked happy and I had lost my chances because I waited to long. I consoled myself by throwing myself into the job even more, and telling myself that you would have just thought of it as a fling. Putting it mildly, Ryan and Esposito had an equally bad summer, having to put up with me. I met Josh at the end of the summer. He was a doctor, cute, smart and filled a need or a void. Truthfully, he didn't fill the void he made it more blatantly apparent. I missed you so much."

"Kate, I didn't know. I am so sorry. " He can't believe how incredibly stupid he had been. He had hurt the woman he loved because he needed to show her that he could still attract a good-looking woman. The biggest mistake he made was letting Gina back in his life. " I thought you would do anything to avoid me. I asked you to the Hamptons and the next thing I knew you were accepting Demmings invitation to go away. You didn't want me, you made it clear, and I couldn't stay and watch you fall in love with him. In the spur of the moment I made that trip from a weekend to the summer to not see you with him."

"I am sorry I hurt you too. It took Esposito telling me that you followed me around for more than the books, that you had enough research to write many Nikki Heat novels. He said that your plans probably never included seeing me with another man. He was right wasn't he?"

"Yes." Castle looks down and responds quietly. "I hurt you too. I jumped into something that was wrong, and I ran when I should have stayed. I didn't know you were planning on coming, and I should have."

Kate scoots closer to him and wraps her arms around his neck. She brings his face to her and their foreheads touch. She closes her eyes and takes in the feel of him so close to her.

"I always wondered what you would feel like up close. If your lips were as soft and delicious as I had imagined. If that spark we feel all the time would turn to something so much more powerful. You don't disappoint Castle. You are so much better than I imagined."

Their lips met in a searing kiss, as their bodies fell together like missing pieces of a puzzle.


	7. Chapter 7

**This has been done a lot, I know. Hope you give it a chance. It has been very hard for me to write lately, I really don't know how real authors do it. I have no excuse other than everything I have written stinks to high heaven. This one didn't come out half bad so I decided to post it. Please leave a review; hopefully it will help get the writing juices going. I hope you enjoy this and I hope that the next few episodes are everything we want. Maybe the creative juices will return after that. I hope so I really miss writing.**

**Disclaimer- what the heck why bother, they aren't mine and never will be.**

"Castle?" She calls out to him. "Castle?" She yells a little louder to get his attention, but her voice is unsure and shaky.

He looks up at her and he stops mid movement. He is taking the things he has slowly accumulated at the precinct on her desk and is steadily putting them in his pockets. Her eyes follow his hands as the small tokens disappear in to his pockets.

"What did you mean by you will treasure these moments when you were talking to Perlmutter?" She has a feeling she knows his answer and she feels her heart constrict as if someone was placing it in a vice, as she waits for his answer. She was so close to telling him, so close to finally admitting to him how she felt.

"You have been acting like you did two years ago, when you decided it was going to be your last case. Is that what you are doing, Castle?" Her eyes bore into him, and she sees it in his distant eyes. The way they no longer look at her like she is the most precious thing in the world, the way they are no longer bright and full of life.

"Why Castle? What have I done to you to make you want to go?" Her voice breaks and her eyes start to fill with tears she doesn't want to shed here. This is where she is supposed to be the strong, intelligent detective, not a crying mess.

"At least you know that you are the reason." He says coldly. She looks at him and the wonderful, loving man she has grown to love dearly is nowhere to be found behind those cold, steel, blue eyes. "At least you aren't that clueless."

He sees how his words affect her. She cringes and drops her head; her hair shields her face from those observing the show. He doesn't really care all that much how she feels right now. She deserves this for playing with his feelings, for thinking he wasn't worthy of her.

"I know it has to be me. For weeks you have been pulling away. Strutting your blonde bimbos in my face, shadowing a new muse. I am a detective and I know it is me you hate and are disgusted by. It is me that is making you run away from here, but what did I do?" The first tear escapes and runs down her cheek. She doesn't even bother to hide it; she knew he no longer thought she was extraordinary so why try to act it.

"I thought we were on the same page and moving in the right direction. I guess I read things wrong. I am sorry I hurt you; it was never ever my intention." Her voice is hoarse and her face is blotchy from the tears she can no longer control.

Her words cut through him like a knife and he suddenly takes in a deep breath. He straightens up and squares his shoulders, ready for an obvious battle. If it is a fight she wants here at the precinct, it is a fight she will have.

"You never meant to hurt me? How dare you say that? You remember the day you were shot. I heard you tell the kid with the backpack at the bombing that you remember everything, while you were interrogating him. Yet, you didn't tell me!" He practically growled at her between his teeth, and his face red with anger.

"Were you afraid to tell your pet author that you didn't share the same feelings? Were you just waiting for me to just fade away and never have to go through the humiliation of letting me down? Am I not good enough for the precious Detective Beckett?" his anger flares and now he is practically yelling at her in the precinct. She opens and closes her mouth but nothing comes out. The pain she feels is worse than the bullet that tore through her at the cemetery.

From across the room they hear Esposito clearing his throat rather loudly letting them know that they are out of line acting like this at work.

"Just as I thought. Well, no worries Beckett you won't have to worry about me hanging around here much longer. Alexis has decided she is going to Stanford or Oxford, Mother is thinking of going on tour with a theater group and I am getting out of New York as soon as Alexis graduates." His words are seething with anger, frustration and sarcasm. He wants her to feel like he has been feeling, but how can she when she doesn't have feelings for him.

He picks up his coat and hangs it over his arm, walking towards the elevator.

"Castle where are you going?" she calls out after him. Tears are now flowing freely down her face. Her eyes are pleading with him to stop,

"Haven't you been listening detective? I am getting as far as possible away from you and this city as soon as I can."

She has to do something. Her one and done is walking out of her life and if she doesn't make her feelings know she will lose him. The thought of a life without him in it, isn't possible.

"But I love you…" her voice is weak and barely louder than a whisper. "I need you, please I have been trying to tell you since that case that I want more."

Castle, stops dead in his tracks. The precinct is suddenly so quiet you can hear a pin drop. Papers stop rustling, keyboards go silent as do computers, even phones suddenly stop ringing, as all eyes focus on the two of them.

"What did you say?" he says walking back towards her. "Don't play with me Beckett, this isn't a game."

"I love you Castle. I loved you when you said it at the cemetery. I loved you when I asked you what we were a year ago, after Lockwood escaped. I know I loved you in L.A. and I think I loved you when you walked out of here with Gina on your arm to the Hamptons. I just couldn't tell you, I wasn't ready. I wasn't good enough for you. I had to fix me before you and I had a chance. I told you that on the swings last Fall. I love you now." The tears have slowed, and her hands are nervously playing with her badge.

"Beckett, you didn't tell me. You have been sitting on this for so long and you couldn't tell me?" His anger is building again. All this time and she couldn't just outright tell him she wasn't ready?

"Castle, I tried to tell you. When you invited me to the Hamptons, I had a talk with Esposito. He told me you had enough stuff to fill a dozen books. That you weren't going to be hanging here seeing me with another man. I thought about it. I knew I had feelings for you. So I broke up with Demming to tell you that I would go to the Hamptons with you. I pulled you out of your going away party to tell you."

"I remember your comment about not needing anything to take me, before you pulled me out of the room. Then Gina showed up just as you were going to tell me something, but you changed your mind didn't you. Because I had asked her and you could no longer tell me you wanted to go. " His anger was slowly dissipating.

"That was the worst summer Castle. I threw myself into my mother's case. I met Josh and threw myself into that relationship to help me forget you. You were right Castle, I did get into relationships with men I didn't love, because the one I did love I couldn't have." She had never opened up to anyone this much. "Esposito, knew I threw the bet when you came back in the fall, because I needed you here. I had been miserable without you."

"When we were in the freezer I tried to tell you I loved you, but I succumbed to the cold before I could. When we faced the bomb with seconds left, all I could think of was that it was your face I would see last, and there was no where I would rather be. In L.A. I came back out of my room, but you had returned to your room. I wanted you so badly that night. Damn it Castle, I love you." Her tears came again. This time she plopped herself in her chair and covered her face with her hands. Never in all the time at the precinct had she broken down like this besides the time she shot Dick Coonan.

Kate Beckett does not break down, she does not show weakness, and she never lets anyone see her cry if she can help it. Yet, here she is crying for a man that just four years ago, she couldn't stand being in the same room with. She wipes her face with a tissue and looks up to see him standing by her desk watching her. His expression is still a mystery to her.

"Say something, Castle?" she asks as she looks up at him from her desk. She feels her heart beating against her chest as she waits for an answer.

"You love me?" He asks quietly almost like he is afraid he heard wrong and she is going to tell him so. How could he have been so wrong?

"Yes, Castle…. I love you. It has taken me a long time to get here, and for that I am sorry. I love you and need you here at the precinct and here…." She points to her heart.

They hear Esposito cough and clear his throat yet again. This time he and Ryan are standing by the observation room door. Both of them silently nod towards the empty room.

"Maybe you two would like to continue this conversation in some privacy with not so many eyes and ears around?" Ryan says to them as suddenly everyone who has been watching the drama quickly gets back to work at the same time.

Castle extends his hand out to her and she looks at it for a moment before she takes it and smiles up at him. He pulls her up and for the first time in weeks they both look at ease with each other.

"Lead the way, Castle." As she stands and walks to the observation room with him, every ones eyes follow them as they enter the room and close the door behind them.

"Ok, everyone the show is over. Get back to work before Gates comes out here and really gives us all a piece of her mind." Esposito reminds them as he walks back to his desk with a smile on his face.

"Hey Ryan, make sure we put some money down on today and tomorrow in the pool huh?"

Ryan looks up and smiles at him. "Already done, bro…. already done."

**I know this is weird, but I put this in with my one shots because it fits. It will only be a two part story and the next chapter will be up fairly soon. Thanks for reading. Please click the little blue link below and leave a review. This has been so hard to write and there have been so many clunkers for me lately, I could use the ego boost. Not to worry it will turn "M" in the next chapter. This is me after all. Hope tomorrow brings us some Castle goodness. Thanks again for reading.**


	8. Chapter 8

**As promised this is the second part of the two-parter. Hope you enjoy it, and hope we get some happily ever after soon. I hope the next few episodes will inspire me to write more. I really miss it, and a few more reviews won't hurt either.**

**Disclaimer – Yup, I checked again and nope none of the cool or non-cool characters of the 12th precinct are mine **

He leads her into the observation room. Their fingers intertwine as he stares down at them. His mind having difficulty registering that she is willingly holding his hand as they walk across the squad room to the door.

Castle steps in, turns around and closes the door behind him, before he turns to her.

"You do know that you just told me and the entire precinct that you love me? You can't deny it, I have them as witnesses." He said trying to diffuse the situation a bit with a little laughter.

"I am not taking it back Castle. I do love you. I can't bear another day like the last three weeks. Why didn't you just confront me? Why did you automatically think I didn't love you? Haven't you noticed all the looks, words, touches?" She really doesn't understand how he could have missed all her gestures.

"I thought when we had our brush with the tiger, that it was obvious where we were headed. I thought the handcuff comment as I was leaving was enough to let you know I wanted you. God, did I want you that night. Or the moment at the bank, when I found you alive and I was so close to kissing you, until your mother interrupted." Beckett walks to the table and leans against it. She brushes her hand through her hair, but she looks down at the floor avoiding Castle's eyes.

He walks over to her and lifts her chin up so he can look into her eyes. He only sees love in them.

"Katherine Beckett, I have been waiting such a long time to hear you say those words to me. I had given up all hope, and hearing you tell a total stranger that you remembered every moment of your shooting, made me feel like my words meant nothing to you." He is staring into her soul as he talks. She feels the pain he was going through sear suddenly through her.

"They meant everything. They are what kept me sane during the treacherous therapy sessions, or the deafening silence of my father's cottage. Your words are what I held onto in the ambulance. Your words have always been what have saved me from darkness, Castle. Your words pulled me from my darkest moments way before I knew you." She can see the confusion her words have caused flicker across his face. She lifts her hands and runs her hand across his cheek and then up through his hair. The gesture speaking volumes as to what she is feeling.

"I treasured your words long before I crashed Storm Fall's book release party. Your books helped me through the darkness following my mother's death. My mother read your books and I found them after her death. At first I read them to keep some of her alive in me, then I read them because the guilty were punished and families got the closure I never got. I stood in line for over an hour to get one of your books signed once. I still have the book, even though it has water damage from when my apartment exploded."

"I knew you were fan early on. I didn't know that my words had affected you so. Why didn't you tell me?" Castle doesn't understand why she has kept that secret. Had he known, things might have happened differently.

"Because you were an arrogant, self-centered play boy when I met you, and there was no way I would have made that ego bigger." She rolls her eyes and smirks as she remembers his cockiness back then. "I didn't want to be just another one of your conquests, Castle."

"Maybe you're right Detective, but I am not that man anymore, am I?" She looks up at him and she gets lost in his eyes for the first time in a long while. "I am sorry for not telling you what I had heard. I should have come to you. We will have to learn to talk about things better in the future."

"Will there be a future, Castle? You aren't going to walk out of here today and out of our lives? My life?" A tear escapes from the corner of her eye, and he reaches up and wipes it from her cheek tenderly. He steps closer to her and his hand winds behind her neck pulling her close to him.

"I'm not going anywhere, Kate. I have all I ever wanted right here." He is so close she can feel his breath on her face. Her hands slide up his chest and over his shoulders. Their chests touch and both feel the sudden electricity course through them.

"Castle? " she whispers as his other hand winds itself around her waist and he hums his answer. Her eyes quickly look down to his lips and she licks her own in response.

"Kiss me?" She tells him, her voice raw with emotion and lust. Somewhere in the back of her mind it registers that he taste like coffee and something uniquely Castle.

His lips crash into hers as three years of pent up sexual frustration explodes around them. Their tongues duel, as they taste each other for the first time. Her fingers run through his hair as she practically climbs his body, one leg firmly wrapping itself around his lower body, she can feel his hardness rubbing urgently against her hot core.

Her hands make quick work of the buttons on his shirt and the zipper of his pants. One hand is now wrapped around his neck while the other is frantically finding its way down his stomach and into his boxers.

"Kate," is all he can mumble in his current state of mind. Her fingers wraps around him and a feral moan escapes him as his hips thrust forward. She starts to pump him and he suddenly moves them and has her pinned against the one-way mirror.

He has made quick work of her shirt and bra is currently suckling her taut nipple, while his other hand pebbles her other nipple between his fingers. Her fingers tangle themselves in his hair as she holds him securely to her breast. The feelings coursing through her body overwhelm her. She has never felt this desperate consuming need for anyone else.

She can feel how wet she is as she grinds up against her hands as she pumps him.

Castle pulls her hands away from him as he moves them again to the table. He sits her at the edge and pushes her back so she is leaning on her elbows and he is leaning over her. He quickly undoes the button of her trousers and slides them over her hip. Her lacy black thong leaves very little to the imagination.

"Wear these for me, Detective?" he rips the offending item off her body easily. His eyes travel hungrily over her naked body lying on the precinct table. Her eyes are half closed and her breathing is quick and irregular. He can smell her cherry bath soap and splash mixed with the distinct musky order of her arousal, and he licks his lips in anticipation.

His fingers dance over her breasts and down her stomach to the very bare lips between her legs. He parts her folds and he hears her breath hitch above him. Her hips move in anticipation and her hands clamp down around the ends of the table. She watches him in anticipation as he hungrily looks at her and licks his lips. She watches him.

She is extremely wet as his face nears her center. A moan escapes her lips as his breath slides warmly over her wetness causing her to shiver. Finally, he runs his tongue up the length of her and settles on her clit flicking it back and forth feverishly.

"Castle, I am not going to last long." She barely gets out before he nips at her clit and inserts a finger deep inside her, making her moan his name.

She can feel her orgasm build quickly. No one has ever made her fall apart like this so quickly. "Please Castle, Oh my God Please?" she begs him as he adds a second finger inside of her.

His teeth nip at her clit and her arousal hits a new plateau, he sucks her clit into his mouth and flicks his tongue over it as he sucks it. Her body quivers uncontrollably as the orgasm crashes over her. He lets her slowly come down from her high.

Beckett pulls herself up and walks him backwards to a chair. She pulls his boxers down his legs and he kicks them free as she pushes him down onto the chair.

"My turn to make you squirm, Rick." She growls as she climbs onto his lap and she impales herself on his hard cock. Her lips crash into his once again as they try to quiet their moans.

She slithers over him in the most erotic ways, as he watches her. Her strong legs raise her enough so that the tip of his cock is barely at her entrance and then she plunges herself on him over and over. He feels her muscles clench around him and it heightens their arousal. His shaft creates a delicious friction, and her walls tightened and take him eagerly into her depths. His hand snakes between their bodies and finds her wet, swollen clit. He pinches it then rubs circles around it and suddenly she is riding him with abandon. The sound of their bodies grinding and slapping against each other, and their guttural moan fill the room as their orgasms build within them.

"Fuck Castle, I am so close again." As her nails dig into his back and she sheathes him aggressively into her.

Castle just moans as his lips crash against her chest, and his fingers frantically pinch and flick her clit. Suddenly her walls contact, throb, and tighten around him, taking him even deeper inside her. He feels her orgasm surge through her, making his erection pulsate and explode within her. Finally, they both collapse into each other's arms from exhaustion.

Her head rests on his shoulder and he feels her lips brush against the pulse point of his neck. She lifts her head and whispers into his ear. "That was incredible and I want that with you until we are both to old to move."

She hears the rumbling of laughter in his chest as he looks into her eyes. Her heart skips a beat when she sees the longing and love she feels reflected in his baby blues again.

"Katherine Beckett if it is this good then, I'm never going to be to old to do that." And he lowers his head and passionately kisses her again.

They reluctantly disentangle themselves from each other. Slowly donning the clothes they had scattered throughout the room. As they get ready to face the music they turn to each other, both smiling.

"I guess this means we are finally together?" he asks her with a sly grin on his face.

"Mr. Castle you just try and get out of this predicament you've gotten us into. I just want you to know that I own cuffs and a gun." She gives him a wink and walks toward the door.

"Is that a threat detective?" he says as he presses his body firmly against hers, trapping her against the door.

"Not a threat, just a promise, and maybe one I can fulfill for you soon, Castle."

Castle's mouth drops open and his eyes glaze over as the fantasy he quickly concocts in his head plays in his mind. His lips press against her and quickly the kisses become heated again. They both know the longer they are in there the worse the gossip and innuendoes will get, and they have been in here way to long as it in. Who know what will be waiting for them out there.

"Kate, you know we are in the precinct?" He stutters between kisses. "I can now essentially scratch making love to Beckett at the precinct off my bucket list."

"You picked a hell of a time to cross that off your bucket list, Castle." She says as she pulls away from him and tries to smooth her clothes and make sure her hair presentable so doesn't scream "I just had great sex with Castle!"

"You ready to face the music?" he says as he squeezes her hand tightly.

"With you by my side, I can do anything." She smiles and starts to open the door.

**I need the sappy, happily ever after ending right now. These two have gone through so much it is just time they get together. With any luck we will be rewarded with something somewhat similar on the show. I for one can't wait. Please leave a review and make my day. I just need 13 more to make 100! I could use a little encouragement to write somemore. Please help me make this one of my 100 review fanfics? Woohooo! **


	9. Chapter 9

**I hope you guys enjoy this chapter. Please leave me a review. Been trying to update more often and now that summer is starting I will have a little more time, and could use the encouragement. If you haven't reviewed before let me know what you think. There are less than 100 days til the Castle 5th season premier. Is anyone else about to burst at the seams? **

**Disclaimer- Sadly no matter how much I want them to be, the characters of Castle are not mine.**

**Chapter 9**

He always watches her. From the moment he saw her at his book launch he was intrigued and he wanted to get into her head, how she thought, why she thought that way. Not to mention she was drop dead gorgeous, not impressed with his fame, and she carried a gun. It was not hard to fall for her head over heals for her.

So, he cashes in a few favors from the Mayor and she becomes his muse. Though the few times he calls her that, she threatens to inflict great bodily harm on him. He watches her track down criminals through the streets of New York in her four-inch heals. He watches her intimidate knife-wielding thugs 150 to 200 pounds heavier than her into confessing everything they had done since kindergarten. No one could deny that Kate Beckett was a force to be reckoned with.

He has enough to write 20 best sellers, but he can't seem to get enough of her. It isn't about the books anymore; it's all about her and he wants her badly.

Today starts like any other day at the 12th. She is already at her desk knee deep in a case. Her hair curtains softly around her face, so he can't see her expression as he walks out of the break room with her umpteenth coffee re-fill. He doesn't need to see her face to know what she looks like right then. Her brow is scrunched up causing her forehead to wrinkle right above her eyes. Her eyes are dark and intense as she tries to find the eluding puzzle piece that will make everything fall precisely into place. He knows that her bottom lip is clenched tightly between teeth without her even knowing it.

As he walks up to her desk she looks up at him. All the worry and frustration from the case washes away as their eyes meet. A smile that can light up the Manhattan skyline spreads across her face, the chemistry between them electric as always.

"Hey, thanks for the coffee." She says softly as he places the large NYPD mug into her hands. The warmth of his hands brushing gently against hers, and the coffee makes her shiver slightly, something that doesn't go unnoticed by him. He notices everything about her.

"You look like you need a break and a little pick me up." He returns as he makes himself comfortable in his chair. They are both smiling at each other like love struck teenagers, but it is so late at night that only the spiders and four legged rodents of the 12th catch the interchange.

"Come on Kate let's go get something to eat and head home." Castle suggests as he holds her coat up for her to slip into. "I'm hungry," he whines and as if on cue his stomach growls loudly. She laughs as she looks at him.

"Wouldn't want you to starve to death, Castle. Let's go." She shrugs on her coat and feels his fingers brush gently across the back of her neck, sending a shiver down her spine, as he pulls the hair out of her coat. She marvels at how his innocent touch can light her body with desire instantly, as she turns and smiles at him. With the empty bullpen empty behind them they are less careful about the slight touches between them. He kisses the top of her head as her heir falls around her shoulders.

They walk towards the elevator, shoulders touching occasionally, but so much closer than has been the rule for them. To the casual observer this would not raise suspicion, but to those who knew them this would cause raised eyebrows and many questions. It has been two weeks, and they have been able to keep it between Martha, Alexis and her father.

The elevator door opens and she walks in and leans back against the wall. He follows her in and presses himself against her.

"Oh, the things I want to do to you in this elevator, Beckett." He whispers in a breathy raspy voice into her ear. He crowds her against the wall, and places his leg firmly between her legs creating incredibly delicious friction that she suddenly craves.

"Castle, we're at work." She sighs, as her body hums with a sudden need for him. She moves her body against his leg, needing him.

Castle reaches over and flicks the emergency stop button, causing the elevator to jerk roughly to a stop. His lips descend on her neck swiftly and his teeth graze the tendons in her neck. He sucks on her pulse point marking her as his. One hand curls around her thigh and pulls her leg up. Her leg instinctively curls over his hip and pulls his hardness flush against her center, making her purr into his neck.

Kate Beckett is a kick ass detective, but in his bed she's wildly responsive and a sexually charged partner. Castle's hand slides down the front of her body, splaying his fingers across the taunt muscles of her stomach. Slowly his hand slides under the material of her dress pants, over her hips and down further to between her legs, her hips jerk forward involuntarily, seeking his touch.

"Castle," she says softly against his lips. Her voice is needy and desperate; Castle gloats silently to himself as he sucks her bottom lip roughly into his mouth.

He moans deeply as his fingers slip gently between her folds, spreading her. Her thong is soaked with her juices and his fingers drip with the evidence of her desire for him. "God, you're wet Kate," he says as his fingertips brush against the bundle of nerves wantonly craving his touch. Her hips buck into his hand, and she presses her body flush against his.

Kate's teeth sink into Castle's neck and her tongue soothes it gently. Her breath cools the area as she tries to speak. "Damn you for being able to do this to me, Castle." She growls into his ear. "You're a god and a curse rolled into one." She moans as she draws the soft lobe of his ear between her teeth.

She feels the rumble of laughter coursing through him, and suddenly feels the loss of his body heat pressing against her. A cold chill runs down her spine as her body adjusts to the lack of heat and pressure his body provides.

"Castle." Her voice drips with desires. "Please?" Her hands fist the front of his jacket and is keeping him flush with her.

His hand slides treacherously slow from between her legs up between their faces. She watches him as he brings the fingers up to his lips and slowly licks her juices of off each digit with abandonment. She is memorized by the display before her. He kisses her roughly making sure she can taste herself on his lips.

He reaches over and presses the button that starts the elevator moving again with a sudden jerk.

"Really? So that's the way you want to play, Castle?" She teases him as she walks him into the corner of the elevator. She kisses and nips down his neck, across his chest, over his stomach until she quickly reached his rather obvious erection. Her tongue traces him over his dress pants, and nips at him playfully. Her hand cups his balls gently and she hums against him. His head falls back against the elevator wall, as his finger whiten over the elevator railing. She smiles when his hips move trying to generate the friction he suddenly craves.

She hears the final ding of the elevator, signaling that they have arrived at the precinct main floor. She gets up quickly, gives his erection a quick tug and walks confidently through the doors as they slide open. Looking over her shoulder she gives him an evil smile, making his heart skip a beat. His eyes narrow as he watches her saunter away.

"Game's on Beckett. You bring it." He growls dangerously under his breath. Suddenly there is a spring in his step that wasn't there a moment ago, and the look on his face is one of excitement, this is going to be very interesting, very interesting indeed.

He walks out of the precinct just a few steps behind her. It is one of those rare days where the sky is that perfect shade of blue, with only a few whisky white clouds littering across it. It has yet to become muggy and it's prefect-walking weather.

"You coming Castle?" she calls after him over her shoulder. He watches her eyes slide over his body to his hips; then up to his lips. Her bottom lips curls in between her teeth and a small sly smile flashes briefly across her face. He knows that look, and god help him survive whatever she has in store. If he is lucky the fuzzy handcuffs she bought just recently will get broken in.

He practically skips over to her as she rolls her eyes at him, he can't wait for them to get to the loft. She won't be going back to her place tonight if he has anything to say about it.

**I really could use some encouragement. So please, if you can just let me know what you think. Or even let me know what you think will happen next here in this story or on the series. I could use people to share my obsession with. To all who have reviewed a huge THANK YOU to you all. This chapter and really all of them are for you! Without you reading why would, I or any author, bother to write? It is you guys that make it worth it. Have a great week all!**


	10. Chapter 10

**I haven't written in a while, sorry to my followers, who deserve better. I have a new teaching job and my day starts at 5 am and I don't get home until 6pm on my early days. I still also have my 2 part-time jobs and my kids. So sadly my writing time has suffered, and I am sorry. I can't tell you how much I miss it. This story is set anytime after the first episode of season 5. Just a glimpse into their behind closed doors life as a couple. Hope you enjoy and let me know what you think.**

**Disclaimer- these characters are not mine they belong to ABC and the genius that is Mr. Marlowe! Thank you for letting me borrow them for a minute….**

**NEED**

"Castle."

His name slips past her lips in a breathless sigh; as his teeth skim the sleek column of her neck, then lick at the faint sheen of sweat and rain from her collarbone. His fingers curl roughly around her hips, digging into her soft flesh. He drags her body roughly against his and lifts her leg around his hip. Her skin feels like molten lava through his fingers.

"Fuck, Castle," she moans as he grinds himself against her, giving her the friction she desperately craves. His dark eyes fuse with hers as he curves his hands possessively in her hair at the back of her skull and drags her mouth hungrily to his. He bites down on her bottom lip and quickly lathes it with his tongue. He moves to her jaw, and then nibbles at her ear as his finger taunt and pull at her nipples.

A deep primal growl vibrates against her skin as he lathes his tongue over her rain-dampened body making her moan in frustration. Her lips part but no words escape them as her body quivers with desperate need for him.

His teeth graze her skin and sink into the pale recess of her neck and the deep groove of her cleavage. Her knees go weak, as he overloads her senses with everything that he is. His touch on her warm skin, his taste lingering on her tongue, the primal growls of his voice in her ear, and finally the smell that is so uniquely him, that she craves it almost as much as her next breath.

He has removed every stitch of their clothing between the front door and his bedroom. Her body hums as his eyes rake over her and drink her in, his fingers drift over her body possessively, and his lips map her body predatorily. Outside a storm brews resembling the one the night she first came to him.

Her fingers begin their glide over his skin to the thin line of hair that starts at his navel and drops down low on his body. Kate gingerly follows the trail, her hand wedging its way between their bodies, her fingers feather gently over the tight muscles of his abs.

Nails graze his hip, his thigh, and finally the thick muscle that spasms against the palm of her small hand until she grips him hard...her eyes flash to find his. Arousal, hot and heady shoots through her as she drinks in the sight of her partner. His eyes, darker than she has ever seen, watch her reactions as she touches him. Her hands spark like flint with each brush along his hardened length, before drifting over the wet tip with her thumb.

Her fingers begin to roam and tease him again. They move down the back of his muscular thighs again, and climb back, repeating the infuriating motion. Each time ends with her holding him in her hand, and squeezing just a bit tighter. Finally he burrows into the curve of her shoulder panting hard and bites down on the tight tendon of her neck.

"Kate," Her name breaks across his lips in a warning growl as he walks her backwards to his bed. There is no going back now, not that either of them wants to.

The back of her legs hit the edge of his bed, she sits back and falls onto her elbows, slowly shimmying to the center of his bed. The lights from the city cast shadows and shimmer across her body.

"Extraordinary no longer does you justice." She hears him growl as he slithers up her body and between her legs. His blue orbs are now lust filled indigo black. She feels his breath cascade over her wet center as he spreads her lips and growls. She moans, as he tastes her as if for the first time; his tongue flattens roughly against her clit and laps the swollen nub. Her hips buck into his mouth instinctively as she clenches his hair between her fingers and holds his face against her.

"Oh Rick, please…" she pants. He smiles against her skin, but refuses to give her what she seeks immediately. He watches her as he slides a finger into her, watches her breathing hitch and her lose herself in the pleasure he provides her. He adds a second finger and starts pumping into her slowly. Her hands grip the rumpled sheets in desperation, as her mouth drops open and her eyes shut.

Kate squeezes her eyes shut, trying not to cry out, as his mouth and fingers boil the blood curing through her veins. She mewls and moans; as he licks and sucks at her clit, grabs her hips and pulls her into his mouth, devouring every bit of her. Her body tightens into a tightly wound coil as Castle swirls his tongue around her, before flicking her clit with his tongue, nipping it with his teeth. The sensation is too much for her and she splinters beneath him. He doesn't stop or slow down and neither do her tremors, they drag on and on until she can scarcely remember her own name.

He pulls his fingers away from her wet warmth, draws his mouth away and hears her whimper. Their eyes meet as Rick licks his fingers clean of her juices. He slowly slides his body against hers and kisses her slowly, letting her savor the sweet and tangy taste of herself on his lips; she shivers as her body craves him deep inside her.

Being able to feast on her body is the most erotic thing he has ever done, but he has lost every bit of restraint he has, and needs her now.

He places himself at her entrance, savoring the wetness encasing his tip. She lifts her hips to get some penetration, and he sheaths himself into her in one swift movement.

Her breath catches in her throat, and her body squirms under him. He has never seen her like this before, so wanting and needy for him.

He pulls himself almost out of her and sheaths himself deeply once again. Kate bucks against him over and over. He can't restrain himself much longer. He pulls out and drives himself into her again and again.

Castle's resolve snaps and he loses control. His strokes dig deeply into her. Her hips meet him stroke for stroke. His mouth finds hers in a blinding kiss and then moves to her neck, where his teeth sink into her skin, mark her as his. Kate only whimpers and begs for her release.

"Faster Castle, Oh God." She feels the coil deep between her legs grow hotter, shr feels the tension coil throughout her body. Her body shakes with uncontrollable need.

His speed increases as he pounds into her in abandonment. Castle is beyond words, his grunts and moans are primal.

"Mine." Castle grunts possessively through clenched teeth. "You're mine Kate."

"Yes, Castle. Please God… I need this Castle." She begs him, as her nails trail down his back, digging into the supple curve of his shoulders.

She struggles below him as his lips crash against hers. Their strokes become frantic and irregular.

"Oh my God Castle…" Kate's body arches as every muscle and nerve in her body responds to the release of the burning coil in her body. Her body shudders below him as her walls clamp tightly around his erection.

"Kate." He hisses her name between his teeth. His body responds to hers and he finally finds his release. Her spasms milk him inside of her, filling her. His body collapses on hers.

"You're everything I have ever dreamed of and more, Kate." He mumbles, and a smile flitters across her face.

Their bodies are slick with sweat, as they lie panting and recovering. Castle instantly cradles her in his arms and drops kisses over her face. She nuzzles into his shoulder and finally finds her voice.

"I love you, Castle." She whispers in the darkness of the room. "I love you and this is more than I ever expected to have, and it's only because of you, Castle."

Their eyes meet with understanding for a moment as sleep slowly engulfs them. Until tomorrow means something so different to them, because they know their tomorrows will include each other now, always.

**Thank you for reading, hopefully there are still a few of you out there that remember me. Please leave me a review if you can, it would make my day **


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